Yes, all those conversations with yourself are thrilling, but have you ever wondered about the consequences of isolation at work? No one talks about it, but it’s tough to suddenly find yourself many kilometers away from home, isolated by barriers of all kinds.
The few friends that have been able to stay by my side made me realize one day: I am becoming an oddball. Apparently, I do strange things like forgetting basic social conventions or acting weird in front of people, making inappropriate comments… And the list unfortunately goes on. But, hey! It’s good to have noticed it on time.
My Work Isolation Story
While we can work on this small issue with practice and therapy, I couldn’t help but think this was just a consequence of social isolation. See, before coming to Europe I had been working remotely for more than 9 years. Yes, I was working remotely before it was cool! But no, I did not like it. Until I missed it. You know? At least I didn’t feel “dumb”, like I kind of do now.
Once I got here, I worked for a brief time in a warehouse surrounded by people 8 hours a day. Tasks were so repetitive you could only talk to each other in order to make time pass quicker. And believe it or not, it made things a lot more tolerable. Now I am a domestic helper. Most clients try to stay out of my way the whole time, which is nice and considerate. It’s not that I want them to talk to me, because I wouldn’t know what to say anyway…
Isolation: Worst-case Scenario
One thing led to another and I found myself searching for info on isolation. Migrants in general tend to be isolated at least for some time, so I know it’s normal, but did you know on the long run it could be virtually catastrophic for your health? Here are the top 5 most dramatic – although sadly true – facts about spending too much time isolated:
- It can increase the risk of dementia by 50%, heart disease by 29% and stroke by 32%.
- People in higher risk of isolation are low-income adults, older adults, LGBTQ+ and yes, immigrants.
- Loneliness is associated with higher rates of depression, anxiety and suicide.
- Social isolation increases the chances of premature death, closely as much as lack of access to healthcare, inactivity, obesity and smoking does.
- Worried enough? Please seek therapeutic help if you experience some of these symptoms: delusions, excessive anger or fear, general confusion, mood swings, inability to cope with normal problems, sleeping issues, unexplained physical symptoms, social withdrawal, depression or substance abuse.
All of this sounds very scary, but the good news is it has many solutions if you catch it on time. It’s never too late to start over in life and give new things a shot. We sure know about it…
How to Avoid Loneliness
At this point you may ask yourself, “do I really need company?”. And if you did, the answer is YES. Because the more you isolate, the more you will want to be left alone. Sometimes you have to push yourself a little bit to socialize, just until your mental battery reaches its limits. But that is just my humble advice as a veteran serial isolator – here’s actually what the experts say:
Follow a daily routine
It may sound boring as hell but this is by far the best way to avoid chaos in your life and in your mind. And it’s not about having a monotone life, but about putting respect on your needs. When establishing a ritual for cleaning, resting, self-care and entertainment, you’re putting yourself first. If you’re a parent like me, you surely know what I mean. It just keeps you sane and makes things easier.
Find the underlying cause
Let’s address the elephant in the room. This may be more of a therapy question, but why are you alone? Of course most of us choose it that way and feel somewhat comfortable, however if you suddenly find yourself a bit lost on social gatherings it can most definitely be a warning sign. There could be many explanations so let’s start digging into those asocial thoughts so we can start working on them.
Join a group
Duh! Of course it’s as easy as it sounds. Yes, and also finding friends beyond small talk… I know the struggle is real, but as I said, you need a good push. What group? Whichever group, preferably one that covers your interests. A book club, film-watching, sports, moms, dads, anything that will snap your bubble and make you realize you’re not such a weirdo.
Well, this has been interesting. But do you know what’s the best part? I think – hear me out – we feel so lonely and isolated but we are definitely not the only ones going through it. I am glad we found each other! So hang out with me at my socials and let’s keep making this process easier for both ❤️